Crosspointe Worship // Leaning - The Church Collective

Welcome to the second installment of the writing room! This is the place where we’ll showcase music from contributors and partners of The Church Collective. You can read more from this particular contributor by clicking on their profile below this feature.

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Tell us about the songwriting process for this song.
What’s the theme of your song?	The theme of Leaning is all about trust. Not a mindless trust that we talk about most of the time in our walks with the Lord, but an active and a very real trust. One that has to let go of things that we have placed our comforts, our securities, and our identities in only to find it all in Jesus. It is the kind of trust that walks you through pain and heartache just to bring you to a greater dependance on Jesus. It is the kind of trust that not only demands you to “let go” of idols in your life, but requires you to “lean back” and fall into the arms of an everlasting God.
This song was written for me before it was written for anyone else. I needed it! So the Lord gave it to me to walk me through some of the darkest days I have experienced. About 2 years ago I found myself in the bottom of the deepest valley and I didn’t really know how to climb out of it…or if I could. I began having panic attacks and anxiety attacks… things I have never dealt with. I would have anxiety about just waking up and facing a new day. That led to depression. This was a place that quite honestly scared me to death. I lost who I was and I lost what it meant to be normal and to think rationally. I didn’t want to leave my house and I didn’t want to be around anyone… not even my wife or kids. Not because I didn’t love them… I don’t know how to explain it… I knew I was messed up and I didn’t want them to be exposed to it. I remember one day reading Psalm 23 and coming across the passage that says, “He makes me lie down in green pastures.” I could not move on from there. The truth that God spoke to me that day was that my life in ministry and the pace at which I was living it was not sustainable or healthy. I was putting so many things on my shoulders that should’ve been on His and I was putting so many things before Him that I should have been laying at His feet. It was in that moment that God reminded me of His goodness and that He is my good Shepherd and that He will hurt me if it means “for my good.” He makes me lie down… even if it means taking my sanity temporarily… He makes me lie down and find my rest in Him. And He reminded me that these pastures weren’t just any pastures… they were green pastures. Pastures full of life! So the end result of my pain and momentary suffering was life and not death! All of this was for my good. Praise God! Leaning came during this season. The bridge came first as just an overflow of my heart and it all came at once. I immediately got to the piano and wrote the chorus. The next day I wrote the verses. This is not my normal writing process, but I don’t think Leaning is a normal song either. I believe this is such an issue for so many people and God wanted me to walk through it and experience it so that I could write this song from a position of experience and brokenness. Sometimes as songwriters and leaders we have to be willing to walk through the fire first so that we can help lead others through it with our songs and our words.
Why would you recommend someone use this song in their church?
I would recommend this song because I think it resonates with everyone. I believe it is corporate in terms of it’s arrangement and melody. More importantly I believe it is corporate in terms of its context. I believe this is a song our people need to sing. It addresses the biggest obstacle we face to growing in our faith with Jesus… trust. Wether it is through a season of depression or just putting too much value in what others think. We all have a hard time letting go of things that we find our security in and fully leaning back into the arms of our Father knowing that He will give us all we need at the moment we need it. Sometimes we as worship leaders have to choose songs that we know that our people NEED to sing over the songs that they WANT to sing. I believe that this is one of those songs.
In what way have you seen God use this song?
We have been hearing testimonies of people who are walking through similar issues or know people who are walking through similar issues. We are seeing people realizing that God is in control of their circumstance no matter how hopeless and chaotic it seems. We are seeing people set free from the guilt and shame of dealing with some of these issues. We are seeing people stop listening to the lies of the enemy and start standing firm on God’s truth and because of that there is victory in their lives. We are hearing how this song has given hope and strength people as they walk through overwhelming circumstances. Wives writing to us about husbands. Friends writing to us about family members or other friends. People struggling with addiction giving testimony about how this song has challenged them to lean on God for strength in their struggles. I’m sure there are more that just haven’t been shared but we are excited to see how God makes Himself known and greater in people’s lives through this. Hopefully the stories are just getting started.